Think you are done with pain? Think again...

 He had always good things to say about his exes.  And Carmen really liked that.  "What Peter says about John, says more about Peter than about John."

He had all kinds of stories, how generous he could be!! Goodness me!! Giving away things, allowing the one he lived with for 3 years stay in the house of his property, buying this, buying that, going here and there... Geez!! It's like a dream!!

But all those things were being told to a woman that in the 8 months that had already gone by NEVER asked for anything.  So... NOTHING she got.  He knew she was looking for an apartment, somewhere to go to avoid sharing the roof with her ex husband, yet he never, ever offered any help of the sorts, not even an idea, nothing.  Silent.  He knew her struggle to keep up with her rescued animals.  And again all she got were good words.  But words mean nothing when you are speaking so highly of other women and treating the one right in front of you like what... I can't even say because I will never know what did she mean to him.  

It was pretty clear to her, that he had different groups of people:  family (of course) exes enjoying all kinds of goodies past and present, being highly talked about... friends with which he had trips, went out for dinner, parties, play golf... and then it was her.    I'd bet my head he had never, ever spoke about her to anyone.  And there she was... feeling worthless again.  

Hey, a couple of months is all I need, she thought.  My ex will move in less than two months and then things will change! Yes they will, because he told me so.  He made me believe things will change.

Thanksgiving was getting closer and if there was something Carmen knew, is that she didn't wan to share any holiday with her ex.  So, after negotiating a little, they agreed that she would go to a hotel for 5 days.  That time would be good for her to unwind, disconnect, be alone, read, work on her computer and of course... high hopes of seeing her love.  Her neighbor.  Her Brett.

Little did she know that another major heartbreak was just around the corner.

That Wednesday she entered her hotel room.  A comfy suite.  She opened her suitcase, which she had packed with a few nice clothes "just in case", and some nice lingerie "just in case".  All kinds of illusions packed in a small suitcase.

Then a miracle happened!! he told her they could go have dinner to a local Mexican restaurant.  Please pinch me, she thought.  Am I dreaming?  She was ecstatic, really happy and excited, but she didn't want to make a fuss.   Hey, it was about time, right!  He was going to pick her up at the hotel because she had a special skill: getting lost even with a GPS.  Took her some extra miles to find that hotel, and leaving when it was dark seemed too risky.

When he arrived, they took a shower together, she made love to him, he fucked her as usual.  They went to eat and then back to the hotel.  They had sex again and then cuddled in bed while one of her Youtube playlists sounded in the background.  She felt so happy she could die.  Finally some normality, hey, I was right.  All I had to do was to be patient and let him do his thing.  

And she still had until Monday.  Couldn't help but daydream, imagine this and that and wonder how many days she'd see him.  That was happiness.  She was touched by an angel.  And that night she cried once again, but just of pure happiness and emotions.

Let's see, she would not see him on Thursday, that's for sure.  Thanksgiving was for family and friends, you know.  And she was no family and no friend.  Not one of the real ones.  You know, the ones you are not ashamed to be seen with.

Also that day, in the early afternoon, a friend challenged Carmen to a bet.  He was 100% sure she would not see Brett during the days she was going to be in that hotel.  She accepted, how silly her friend was.  I it was elsewhere she would have her doubts.  But in a hotel, come on! that was his natural playground.

Thursday went by.  "Happy Thanksgiving"

Friday came and then left.   Alone...

Saturday had its sunrise and its dusk.  Alone...

Sunday came.  Her level of sadness, hopelessness and the hurt she felt inside was killing her.  This was too painful to be true.  If there was a moment in her life when she felt worthless, used, dragged around like a rag doll, this was it.  And it was all her fault for being so stupid, so naive, so trusting, so stupid again...